Spoof science news: Citizen scientists explore adaptability of Dale Creatures world-wide. Chief researcher, Grompus Grilpnip, of Winchett Dale fame, has led the Arizona citizen scientist team conducting the vital viability study of Hortus Complainus in the wilds of the west. See niffsoup.wordpress.com.niffsoup.wordpress.com
1. As the highly anticipated publishing date for the last of the Matlock the Hare trilogy, The Trial of the Majickal Elders approaches, Oct 3, 2016, a state of panic among Grilpnips of the Dale has ensued. They are prized for the delicious tastiness of their most valuable root vegetable feature: the nose. How can this vital nasal feature be preserved going forward? When the world knows of the tastiness, how will Grilnips survive?
2. Previous work has failed to address this critical issue, according to Grompus Grilpnip, thus he has travelled to the research fields of wildest Arizona to secretly find a solution.
3. Grompus theorized that the arid climate of Arizona, combined with the features of the prevailing vegetation, would be key to finding a solution.
4. After exhaustive field research, Grompus and his team of local vegetable citizen scientists retreated to the lab to compile their findings.
5. After experiments were completed, Grompus was satisfied! Existing in the arid, sometimes hostile environment of desert country has toughened the nose! In addition, the spicy flavor of the nasal appendage has mellowed to a milder, in fact, rather “yechus” one, especially in comparison to local vegetables that grow in Arizona.
6. As a result of the research, Grilpnips world-wide will be able to apply this technique to preserve their noses, reputation and sanity.
Find out the REAL story: http://www.matlockthehare.comwww.matlockthehare.com
And with such ‘peffa-ganticus’ scientific leaps (an oidy one for a grilpnip, but giant for most Dales-creatures across the globe) will many more largely clottabussed solutions be found to a selection of most glubbstooled problems… I trust grompus will have this work thoroughly independently verified by a leading group of Arizona’s most prominent nasal root-vegetable researchers (preferably over a few guzzworts in the local inn) in order to validate such revolutionary findings! Top work – all concerned!!
Uh, oh, he may have neglected to consider the utter lack of guzzworts lately, plus the consumption of foreign brew.
Reblogged this on Niff Soup and commented:
Well, if you ever wondered what a grilpnip’s really been up to in Arizona for the last month…